The Chronicles of L.J.Stevans: Part. 12. A Second Chance Lost.

To my Brother L.J.,

I have been reading your Chronicles on here and I have seen you basically only talk about your “great” deeds you've done. And the only people to write in have been over flattering on your character. I know you didn't kill Bethany with your own hand but in my opinion you are clearly responsible, just for the fact you got involved in our Families business yet again. You should stay out of it little brother, but at this point it doesn't really matter anyway, does it? Your fate is sealed, your death is imminent, but perhaps if you just stay out of the way you will die quickly and Father won't make you suffer to your last breath.

I have strayed off topic a bit here but you know where I'm going with this. Why don't you talk about your blood-lust and the vengeance side of you? Why don't you talk about Vanessa? Why don't you tell everyone out there about what YOU took from ME? I know how your “gift” works, once you've been asked a direct question you must answer it. So go on, tell us about your darker side. Just know this Logan, when we meet again I will be the last face you see. And I will be grinning like a school girl while watching the life fade from your eyes.
                                                                                      Ellen Stevans

--------------2 HOURS LATER-------------

To Ellen and everyone else reading this,

I don't really understand what your point is with all of this, after all it was YOUR actions hat led to what transpired. If you just want to hurt me by making me relive the darkest moments in my life, then fine I will oblige. I do not like talking in the narrative form, but since I am privy to all the facts of these events I will tell them as they should be told. I will hold nothing back.

The following tale is very hard for me on many different levels. While people have been killed because of my interference with their misdeeds. I had never before taken a life with my bare hands. This was also the first time I discovered that not only do some people not take advantage of a second chance you offer them, their grudge will not fade and eventually they will turn up and make you pay for your mercy.

I was about 28 years old when I decided to first sneak into one of my siblings compound, I had heard many disturbing things about Ellen so I though I should pay her a visit. You see Ellen has never used the Families Company name as a front for her criminal activity. She didn't feel she needed to, she had most of the area locked down. Unlike some of my other sisters that paid their men in cash to buy their loyalties, Ellen used fear to control her men into servitude. She married the leader of four large town militia's, Anthony, a very clever strategist and powerful man. Even though there were the obvious benefits that came with marrying your way into a leading role of a vast army, there were never any doubts about the love they carried for one another. Even the worst kind of people are capable of unconditional love, and make no mistake about it, that's what they felt for each other. Even though they ruled the town with an iron fist, they did not kill the people in there towns nor did they tax them into poverty, while that may seem fine and dandy the residents of those outlying towns had little to no freedoms. So I felt a quick look was in order, to see if there was any help I could offer to the subjects under Ellen's rule.

I made my way into the main building on Ellen's land and as I was snooping through paper work in one of their libraries, when.......she walked in. She couldn't be more than 25 and had the face of a goddess to go with her penetrating blue-shaded-silver eyes. Even in an unflattering servants garb, her perfect figure still managed to be accented. She had long flowing dark blond lock of hair stopping just above her lower back. Quite simply, she was the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She paused a moment as she walked in and saw me there, her first instinct was more than likely to scream but for some reason she did not. Instead she calmly closed the door and asked me who I was. Now by this age I had been with many women in fact I prided my self on my witty words and charming demeanor. Still when she addressed me my mouth got dry and for a moment I forgot my own name. I quickly gathered my self and made my introduction. “My name is L.J. Stevans” I replied. She recoiled at the mere mention of my name but still she did not flee or call out for the guards. She sat down on a box close to her and said “Your Ellen's Brother, so your the one that has been a thorn in the side for her and he sisters. Nice to meet you, my name is Vanessa.”

I almost got caught up in small talk when I realized I was breaking and entering a very dangerous place for me to be. The door started to creak open and startled us a bit, my instincts were kicking in but hers were a tad faster and way more satisfying. She pushed against the wall and kissed me....deeply and locked eyes with me as a signal to just go with it. Fortunately for us it was just another servant and it was clear that kissing was a standard use for this library, probably the only way most of these people had relationships. As quick as the servant entered she left closing the door quietly behind her. At that we separated our lips from one another, she had stolen my breath from me and from the look on her face I may have shook the world a bit for her as well. It was a moment we wish we could have extended, but before another word could be uttered commotion rang out in the halls. It seems as if my presence here has been detected, I grabbed Vanessa's hand and started to lead her out towards a back exit I saw earlier, but she stopped me. “If we go together we will be found, as much as I would love to leave here perhaps this is my purpose, to help you get away. Punishment should not be so bad as I will bend the truth a bit to try and keep my self out of Jail downstairs.....GO now.....you can make it”

As I have stated several times, I am no hero....not a true one anyway. I didn't want to leave her behind but I knew that if we were discovered together it would mean death for us both. I released her hand after much hesitation and we went our separate ways. I knew I could slip away rather easily, however as I got closer to the door I felt a tug at my heart strings. It was her image, I couldn't get it out of my head or my heart. So I did something I don't normally like to do, I did something foolish and heroic. I turned back but did not have to go far, fore there she was, her hands bound behind her. I could see the back of a tall man and could hear him screaming accusations at her in a voice that sounded so familiar yet I could not place it. Never the less, why wasn't she defending her self, she could have easily said hat I held her against her will, but she didn't. She just stood there stoically in defiance, but even from my vantage point I could see the tears starting to flow as they led her down to the sub floors. At that moment I knew two things for sure. First, I was not leaving this place without her, and second, I had no clue how I was going to do it. But I knew I HAD to try. To that point,  I had never been in love, lust yes, but not anything close to what I was feeling right then.

I crept down the stairs to the prison below, I heard screams which I quickly recognized as Vanessa's. They had her bound to the wall with her backside out,  her top  was pulled down exposing the skin on her back. I realized they were flogging her, I didn't know what to do, I usually have a plan going into these type of things, I'm not used to rescuing on the fly like this. I could not allow my mind to dwell on that, so I just sprang into action, I pulled a small yet foul smelling gas bomb I used when needing to make an escape, from my belt pouch. Without regard for my own nose I threw it just 10 feet in front of me, at the feet of the man doing the flogging. As I passed guards I pulled out my silver dagger and hamstrung them sending them to the ground in agony. I reached the jailer dishing out Vanessa's punishment, he started choking on the gas and turned to me and was greeted by my elbow crashing into his nose, he staggered back but did not fall. I lunged at him with a second attack, this time a swift kick to the groin followed by a brutal knee right under his chin. This time it put him on his back and it was at that moment I knew why I recalled that voice. It was William, the man responsible for the crimes in Milton just 5 short years before that was staring back at me with instant recognition in his eyes. He tried to make his way to his feet but was met with one of mine to his head instead. I pulled Vanessa's shirt back on to her and cut her down, she had tears in her eyes as she fell into my arms. Even through all that she was still the most beautiful creature I had ever come across, I almost got lost into her eyes again, but the putrid smell creeping up to me prevented that. We ran back past the guards and up the stairs we climbed. All the commotion settled down up stairs so getting out was not that difficult.

Jack was waiting by the south wall just as we planned before hand, we found an old truck weeks back and got it running for this mission, simply because horses would be far to slow if things went bad. I'm very glad we decided to bring the vehicle because bad is exactly how it went. He opened the door and gave me a perplexed look when I slid Vanessa over to him. “You just have a woman magnet strapped to you somewhere don't you Logan” He quipped. “Just hit the gas old man” I replied to him with laughter under my words. Vanessa had passed out by this time and as we drove away from the frenzy I started, I couldn't help but once again get lost in her beauty, this time I didn't hold myself from it.

We couldn't return to my property, William saw me, so by now Ellen knows everything, and soon they will be coming for me. We stopped at one of Jack's many safe houses, the man was very connected. I gently put Vanessa on a bed in the back room and started to treat her wounds, the pain eventually woke her. She opened her eyes and looked up at me, at first with confusion, but after I held up the gauze and gave her a disarming smile, she nodded her head with understanding. At that she closed her eyes again, this time knowing I was there watching over her. She awoke sometime later and I explained to her everything, why I was there, the situation with my Family even the events in Milton with William. I asked her why he was there, and she told me he was the head guardsman and jailer, and that he also was one of most skilled trackers in the region. She made sure to emphasize that, knowing he would be on our trail soon.

As we ate dinner that night with Jack, she told us all about herself, she was an only child and at the age of 15 she was sold to Ellen by her parents. Human trafficking was rare in our region but still did happen, but I felt an immediate bond with her, she was like me.....abandoned by her family, cast aside like an after thought. Jack left soon after dinner to obtain information about any movement on Williams or my Families part. Once he left I knew Vanessa was going to ask me a question, one that I knew I would have to answer truthfully, and likely embarrass myself. “Logan, why did come back for me?” She asked. There it was, my mind started a long structure of words about her beauty and how she made me feel, but my heart intervened and forced my lips to utter “Because I love you” with hardly a hesitation. My face reddened as I waited for her imminent laughter. It never came, when I looked back at her, she had tears in her eyes again but not in pain or sadness this time, but in realization. Realization in not only did she know I meant what I had just said but that she felt the same way for me. She took my hand in hers and I slowly brought it up to her face, she nestled into it and stared into my eyes as she returned the phrase to me. I leaned forward slightly and kissed her. With that we fell into one another completely body, mind and soul. I have had sex with a few women at that point, but with Vanessa it was the first time I had ever made love.

When we awoke, I checked her wounds and bandages and we sat down to eat. Almost from the moment we left the bed we could not stop holding each others hand, We sat that way throughout breakfast as we talked about what was next. I coyly asked if she had any friends or anywhere safe she could go, but the smile on my face betrayed my words, fore we both knew we were never to part again if it could be helped. So with Jacks help we ran. I had never done that before. Jack once said to me during our search for safety that standing up and fighting for the one you love is one thing. But to run with the one you love....now that is a true test of emotions.

For the next 2 years we were on the move, never in one place more than 3 months at most. However, we never got close to running into trouble, thanks to Jack and his connections. Jack's informants also let us know it was indeed the head guardsmen that was on our trail. However, we always stayed 3 steps ahead of William, but to his credit he never stopped searching.

During our time together, Vanessa and I lived like tourists. We never laid down roots, kept moving, seeing all the wonders our world has to offer. It remained that way, until we thought we may be safe in this last town we found called Elders Creek over on the coast by The Great Eastern Ocean. We were isolated, close enough to the town to stay well supplied but still far enough away to ensure our protection. Even Jack, who frequently checked in on us thought we were safe. We found out 3 months prior, that Vanessa was with child and I was to be a Father. So we wanted to set up a home....and we did. Deep down I felt that it was just a matter of time til we were found, because even though you stop running the ones searching for you only heightens their pursuit. And heighten his pursuit William did.

A few months had passed with no sign that our trail had been picked up. Jack and I were returning from a mission close by, helping run off some highwaymen, and when we reached the edge of my land Jack and I parted ways for the night. As I.......(L.J. Pauses and takes a deep breath and wiped his eyes).....As I returned home I could not have foreseen the horrible sights that would befall upon my eyes. When I opened the door a strong scent of blood hung in the air, I looked down and saw that I was standing in a puddle of it, I let my eyes raise up and saw a trail leading up the stairs and down the hall. I followed the path of blood to my study, I opened the door slowly, my brain already knowing what I would find even though my heart held out hope. As soon as I stepped over the doorway my eyes went straight to a table, on the table lay Vanessa, my wife. my love, my soul mate. She was butchered like cattle the only thing not mutilated or covered with blood was her head. I dropped to my knees sobbing, for what it felt like an eternity, but my tears quickly turned to rage, a rage I had never felt before. I looked down on the floor and noticed that there were several trails of blood and in fact they spelled out something. I reached up and turned on the light and read the cold words written in my dead wives blood. It said “This time you WILL burn”. I barely had time to read it when the room erupted in flames. I had walked into a fire trap.

 I could hear taunts and yelling out side and again I heard a voice I recognized. Without a care for my own safety, I grabbed the closest chair and ran straight towards and out the window. I plunged a good 13 feet to the ground but was up in a flash, rage, vengeance and adrenaline fueling me now. The first 2 men came at me weapons drawn, from the right side of my belt I pulled my single shot pistol and dropped the closest man on the right. On my left side of my belt I produced my trusty silver dagger and I threw it with all my force, taking the second man down with head shot. I was running now, running towards the 3 remaining men, I grabbed my dagger from the skull of the dead guard as I past him. I could see the panic in Williams eyes. He pushed both men forward and ordered the one with a gun to fire, he do so, nailing me in the left shoulder, a wound I could not even feel as I was so over come with anger and grief. Before he could get another shot off, my dagger was plunged into his heart. I stopped and let the now charging final guard close the distance, I retrieved my dagger once again and pulled the dead guardsmen sword from his sheath. I characteristically am not a fantastic swordsmen, however I am proficient enough to make a name for my self in the tournament circles, I would visit them whenever I was too bored or short on coin. None of that mattered though, because when you are running on the type of rage I was skill hardly mattered. I fought as if I don't care about living or not because in this case I didn't. He got no closer than 2 steps to me before I dispatched him with a brutal slice of my sword that caught him in the neck. And then there were only two of us.

I stared at him as if I was shooting lasers from my eyes, he had a look of dread on his face. As I stepped forward to him his expression change to a snarl like smile one that showed his devious thoughts. The snarl became more of a smile of amusement and mirth as he pulled his pistol out from behind his back. I never stopped coming forward even as he fired, his shot hit it me right in my upper left chest as it dropped me to the ground and this one I most certainly felt. He started at me again, this time he dropped his pistol and drew a sword. He was mocking me now but stopped short as I started to rise yet again. He now wore a face of disbelief, I threw my dagger at him as hard as I can and a parried it perfectly to the ground as I knew and anticipated he would. The the taunts started once again, (it was no secret that William is one of the best swordsmen in the region) He yelled at me that all his men had there way with Vanessa and they made her feel feel inch of her death, he continued on boasting about the fact that he himself drove his sword into her stomach and through her womb so there was no way my legacy would be carried on. With that vile comment I ran at him with a short sword I picked up as I returned to me feet. I screamed and held out my sword wide to my left, but as he move to block my attack I stopped short and and nailed him right between the eyes with a good sized rock I managed to palm. He stumbled back and dropped his sword, I went into a roll and retrieved my dagger from the earth and deposited directly into Williams throat. I stood there watched him slowly die and for the first and only time I did so with no remorse and with great satisfaction.

Jack arrived moments later and found me there sitting in a pile of my own blood, my burning house served as a dramatic background I would venture to guess. He started to walk towards me, while he stopped quickly and searched Williams body. As he did so he explained that he saw the smoke from the fire and came as fast as he could. He stopped his words short when he saw my crumpled form shaking with anger and sorrow. It was then when I looked up and saw Jacks face that I truly lost myself to grief. My sobbing became an uncontrollable river of pain and loss. This was the first time Jack had ever seen me cry. Not even when he arrested my Father for my Mothers murder did I shed a tear. However, he knew time was short and he had to get me going, he said to me that more men are on the way, to which I responded “Let them come, Hell will be overflowing tonight no doubt”. Neither one of us knew exactly what I meant but at least it sounded good. He grabbed me by my good arm and picked me up and said “Your not going to let them win now? Are you Logan? After all that they have taken from you, your just going to sit there and die? Get up Boy.” And up I went, being supported by Jack's shoulder as we moved to his truck. As we drove away I looked back at my burning house and thought of Vanessa again, but soon I thought of nothing as my world faded to black.

A week later I regained full consciousness, I open my eyes and saw that I was in a small clinic, Jack was asleep by my bed. I moved my arm around and was relieved that there was not too much pain, as soon as I felt I was ready and able, I started moving and I knew I had to move fast. When Jack opened his eyes I was gone and so were my cloths and weapons. He knew where I was headed to, and decided to give me a 30 minute head start before he came after me, after all, he can't be held responsible for something he was not present for. At least that is what he would tell me later.

…...............Excuse me for a moment would you..........

----------------10 MINUTES LATER AFTER REGAINING HIMSELF-------------

…..Sorry for that folks, I had to step away to gather myself....

I found the fastest transportation I could, in this case it was a truck...Jack's truck to be exact, I kind of stole it, and made a bee line for Ellen's compound. I once again had no trouble sneaking in, and once I did I didn't care about being detected anymore. Men rushed me and as they did they fell before my feet. I sent many men to Hell on that day, fury burning in my eyes. I walked in to the section where Ellen and Anthony stayed. Ellen stood up as did Anthony, he came in front of me in defiance saying he would not allow me to kill Ellen. I got even closer to him and told him in a whisper, “I'm not here for Ellen”. With those words I plunged 2 daggers into his chest and stomach one from each hand, I looked him in the eyes and saw the disbelief that sunk in. Then I turned my gaze to my Sister and as I did I pulled both daggers across his abdomen in opposite directions, opening him wide onto the marble floor under our feet.

Ellen was frozen by fear as I walked closer to her, she made no movement, a look of dread now occupied her face. I told her this, as I now stood in front of her. “You took my love away and now I took yours, not an even trade by a long shot but it will have to do. I am letting you live because I can't bring my self to kill you even now. But more than that I am not like you and the rest of our family, I am a man of second chances. I gave William one 5 years ago in Milton, and it burned me didn't it? He chose to stay with the family and continue his criminal ways, so I had to revoke that chance. Do not squander this second chance I'm granting YOU sister. If we meet again and you are still with the Family doing fathers bidding...plain and simple I will end you." And with that I walked out.....she made no move against me.

In fact today's post was the first I had heard from her since that day. It seems by her words that she has stretched that second chance as far as it could go. Another revocation may be in order. But that is work for another day.

I was not sure if I should discuss Vanessa. It may have been years ago but it still hurts to this very day. I gave second chances to many people...many people indeed but not to myself not to my heart. That part of my heart that loves the way it did when I was with Vanessa died with her I believe.

I know I rambled on here for a long bit, but I felt you needed the entire story, but now I must think on recent events, you will hear from me soon everyone. Stay Safe out there.
                                                                                       L.J. Stevans